REFLECTIONS ON NISHIDA HIGASHI, 2023

I have had the mind to write something dedicated to Nishida sensei for sufficient years.

In my green days, sensei's works were peculiar to the BL market where young-adults and teenagers were the focus of most BL stories. Sensei writes about characters falling in love in their mature years. The portrayal of desperate pining mixed with witty dialogue is sensei's signature. 

To this day, BL market has since grown into a vast ocean with no edge in sight, Nishida sensei's touch as a creator is still quite dazzling, irreplaceable in my heart.

Including officially sanctioned translated titles. To be more specific, the ones published in Taiwan and North America.

No spoilers, reviews are arranged in order of completion.

Chinese ver.｜Blog ver.｜Sensei's twitter: ピヨヨ(西田ヒガシ/東) (@piyoyopiyoyoyo) 

All images used in this collection were captured from personal copies. All copyrights belong to Nishida sensei and Publishing Houses.

President Momoi-Kun 『社長桃井くん』

The new CEO, Momoi, who got the title through nepotism, inspects his new kingdom, and his sole goal? Seek a hot stud to be his lover within, preferably, a gentleman donning specs! To his own surprise, he is drawn to the earnest manager director, Watanabe. The man's not only straight, married but also old enough to show wrinkles! How on earth would this kind of man show up in a BL comic?!

This is the one and only official English translation. I bought the digital version through Rakuten Kobo.

As shown in the introduction, President Momoi-kun is a gag work that breaks the fourth wall. As an avid reader of Nishida's, it's like seeing Nishida sensei's post-scribbles become the main body of content. It's familiar nonsense and familiar technique, bearing resemblance to sensei's former works.

Considering this a joke piece, not only did it reference other genres (cuisine manga comes to mind), it also made fun of manga storyboard arrangements and general romance tropes, sensei even made fun of her past works…! 

Not an appropriate entry point for Nishida beginners, nor for novice readers with no knowledge towards manga techniques I would say.

Quaint BL comedies like Momoi-kun are relatively rare in recent years. Experienced BL comic readers might find a similar vibe in works from mangakas such as Sakurai Shu3 sensei or Kyusyu Danzi sensei. For newbies, So What If I’m Married? by Kirino Mahiro sensei could act as an association of image.

Let us get back to the work itself. Our protagonists, Momoi and Watanabe, fit two of Nishida's common character archetypes: a seemingly frivolous wanderer, and its counterpart, a serious suit-and-tie on the edge of so-called normality. 

As the two got closer day by day, albeit the plot could be absurd, there was sincerity in their relationship, enough that it tugged at readers' heartstrings.

On another note, Katsuragi, the supporting role, had a side story focusing on him, a total contrary to the major story, it was somber, bizarre and with a hint of Dorian Gray.

FYI, If anyone is interested in this version, I would advise you to purchase it directly via DMI's Juné Department.

A Knight's Love Story 『ラブストーリー』

Wayfaring pilgrims rescued a wounded knight from his doom, amongst them, Daniel, postponing his own aim, accompanied Leonard the knight safely home to meet his beloved.

I was not sure exactly how to spell the protagonists' names, so I searched for some keywords. I'd like to think my initial assumption was correct, or at least alright. Correct me if I was in fact dead wrong m(_ _)m

The original Japanese title was simply Love Story, depicting the journey centering on a naïve knight with unrealistic dreams, and a lay brother who knew neither his way nor conforming to his religion. On this journey, their relationship grew from bicker to recognition, to mutual caring.

The story made quite an impression on me with its medieval setting and impeccable script. Imagery wise, characters' eyes and facial expressions were widely utilized in the panels to create an almost wordless atmosphere. The silence between gazes could be feelings holding back, or concealed desires denied by the time. The sense of untimely immorality and despair was further strengthened by Daniel's religious background, and Leonard's longing for family.

People went through arduous pilgrimage in anticipation of salvation in the story. Their path may differ from those of others, but like the meaning of the name Daniel, even if they were not blessed by the sun, they could still revel in the moonlight shoulder to shoulder, only the unseen god can judge the light in their heart, hence the end of their struggling pursuit. 

I consider this one a rather classic BL story.

Paradise Paradise

All he had only wanted was to relieve his pain of getting jilted in love, little did office employee Yuzuki know a business trip abroad would land him on a desert island along with his austere superior, Nozawa.

The protagonists of Paradise Paradise look familiar in Nishida's worlds, a sensitive gay man trying to smother his own feelings, and a traditional macho workaholic. The two of them encountered the extreme at their worst, relying on each other was the best they could do. To put it simply, it was love born on a suspended bridge. Even if they accidentally learnt of the other's gentleness, or peeked into the other's insecurity, what of the future?

Let's Fall in Love 『恋をしましょう』

One of the earliest Nishida works I had read. An anthology comprising 5 original shorts (counted in CPs), and one posterior short from “目を病じないで”. When I was green and callow, seeing the world as black and white, the book left an impact on me. It might sound exaggerating, how humans, and BL as a genre portrayed like that amazed me. (I was quite young, so easily impressed, lol)

And this re-read reminded me that some content in this book was in fact kind of dark.

Let's Fall in Love + Feeling in Love

Kobayashi, a corporate adviser, who considered himself a Casanova, while handling a case of merger, got attracted by Araki, the managing director from the absorbed party, who was way too positive about the entire ordeal. Though they both knew deep down, what followed after the merger would never be as promising as their imagination.

Let's Fall in Love was my starting point to Nishida's story wonderland. I will not repeat myself too much since I have already mentioned similar designing traits above. 

However, for this review, I did pay more attention to the storyboard/panel side of designing details, Nishida sensei's control over characters' countenances and body languages looked wondrous as ever. 

Manga as a medium is truly fascinating, especially in terms of romance genre that specifically emphasizes on human emotions and desires. I felt touched by humanity with sensei's works.

DIRT

Nishio, a bank manager, felt off as he returned to work, he was instantly held at gunpoint and threatened with his colleague's life by armed robbers, whom Nishio tricked into delaying their mark successfully, but he was forced into a one-on-one interrogation with an unhinged crook.

This one is my fave among the batch, an absurdity akin to the opening of a Tarantino movie. A theater of wicked lust, featuring a perceptive banker who was courageous enough to face a sadistic robber who did not exactly play by the books head on. It was silly fun but spicy hot.

Can't Go Back in Time

Nanbu and Hirose, who were competitors at the same time, met many years later. The latter had risen to a high position and was very rude to the former for being in an idle department. Soon they had a fierce conflict due to different opinions at work.

Overflowing the Heart

Kasuga, who has a successful career, faces tremendous work pressure after being promoted to a management position, but soon he develops a physical relationship with a company security officer who is always looking for opportunities to get close to him.

Take Me with You

Salaryman Chiba took a nosedive in life, his job suspended, health deteriorating, and he couldn't kick his bad habit. Left alone to sort out his own mess, his only consolation was his junior in work, Shimizu, who accompanied him through the worst.

These 3 shorts are similar in terms of overall theme, let me squeeze my thoughts into one chunk:

All feature a lead losing oneself, more or less in consequence of work pressure,  and being in a romance does not solve the problem/trauma. Sometimes, more realistically, a person can remain in a loop of negativity, no matter willingly or forced, to a point incapable of proper socialization, which then demolishes relationships. 

Albeit easier said than done, the resolution to a comfortable, achievable mindset, besides medical approach, is usually to adjust one's focus and activity. (Seek help if truly needed though, seriously.)

Back when I first read this manga, the opinion of the masses was not as open as today. Media involving same-sex relationships/characters often resolved in misfortune. 

Even BL back then hailed tropes such as “love regardless of gender,” or “marry a woman to fit societal norms.” (Those still exist, relatively prevalent in fact, there are even new methods like adding fictional world settings to present the suffering of being different or inferior to others. )

Revisiting all these books reminded me of a much more crude era.

Adolescent Malady『青春の病は』

High school condisciples Minato and Matsumoto had shared a memory of an embarrassing ordeal. When they reunited due to work, both of them had shed their puerility, now in their adulthood, they acted and conversed as such. However, for Minato, the past fervor and frenzy of his youth had since reignited.

First time is always unforgettable.

Doesn't have to be love, it can be something that one pursues with a burning spirit and true emotions in one's lifetime, Adolescent Malady is precisely that, an ordinary tale of an abandoned first-love. 

The protagonists could conceal or deny to each other and themselves however they want, there was no getting away from the happening that they've been changed by the past they had. Embers that were once flames buried within them, still warm and everlasting.

Such as they were, knowing but never acknowledging, the two spent years looking for each other's shadows in adversity. 

Minato, who could not forget, chose his liaisons with similar likeness to quench the thirst; whereas Matsumoto, afraid of staying astray, aimlessly drowning in aloof relationships, wanting someone that truly understood him. 

Met again in their thirties, bound by societal norms, what was once there in their instinctual youth, finally bursted out of the shell.

However reserved and restrained, Matsumoto's presence disturbed Minato, his mind boiled under stoic countenance, showing the least degree of sentiment. The deterioration of his self-control was most memorable.

Here's some boomer talk:

Adolescent Malady belonged to an era even BL as a newfound genre itself was not entirely open to the idea of total acceptance to its featured sexual orientation and character identities. 

People of the time might not necessarily agree with the lifestyle, but love as a concept and ideal is the most comprehensible yet the most challenging. 

BL is a method, an imaginary  path for both creators and recipients to explore that concept, the transcendent purity of it. Thereupon it has little to do with participants' personal political stance. 

Some BL works from the 2000s were ennobled partially for choosing a relatively realistic portrayal of same-sex relationships, showing its complexity, frailty, proclivity, and of course, humanity. 

To name a few, Yoshinaga Fumi sensei's The First Class is Civil Law, and the long running series What Did You Eat Yesterday? Or Mizushiro Setona sensei's The Cornered Mouse Dreams of Cheese that encapsulated the dilemma of mutual recognition between a gay man and a straight man that were in a relationship. 

While leaning towards recreational purposes, I do consider Nishida sensei's to be in this camp as well.

Lastly on this topic, I am in no way bashing or degrading BL neither its criticism, I was only giving my opinion, based on decades of observations and some academic studies. 

Human history took a toll on the masses' biases and prejudices. Instead of pointing fingers, I think doing better is the more constructive way to advance in life.

You Will See Heaven + Good Night

Combined follow-ups to both Before Wishes Fulfilled and Adolescent Malady. Kudo, from Before Wishes Fulfilled, led the first short, telling the aftermath of him leaving the yakuza. 

On the other hand, acting more like an extra, the characters from Adolescent Malady met Kudo in Good Night. I'd recommend reading Before Wishes Fulfilled first before this one for sure. 

You Will See Heaven was closely tied to Before Wishes Fulfilled. Kudo left everything behind yet his past life followed him everywhere. 

On this escape he encountered another elusive man, admittingly differ in character, who was almost a recurrence of Fukami, the man and the reason that Kudo got to live this next life. 

Devastatingly, Kudo had to witness the end to a road of violence, once again.

Division ~ The Great Escape of Love ~  『ディヴィジョン』

During a duty trip, novice law practitioner Asano was wrongfully arrested in the Philippines for a mistaken valise. Alongside Asano, a Japanese man proposed to help him escape. In the blink of an eye, Asano found himself in the company of Tanaka, a middle-aged man who reeked of booze, as they embarked on a fateful flight in this foreign nation.

Chef's kiss.

This one took a while. I worried over how to express my affection without spoiling anything. A mere glance at the intro might already give too much away.

Trapped on a lawless land, barred behind language barriers, Asano, a virtuous man, had to rely on Tanaka, who's both cunning and mercurial. Completely different in every aspect they were, yet they almost mirrored each other in a complementary way.

Tanaka, who extended his hand to the clueless Asano regardless of his own benefit, was a scofflaw that had lived a life of hustle and extortion, barely did he ever know the proper way to maintain relationships, still and all, he craved for a lover's yearning. 

In contrast, Asano despised cruelty and bluster, his body maybe weak but rigid in mind, numerous times could he be back out of this charade of an escape, nevertheless, he broke his own principle for Tanaka, time after time.

The two's courtship dances were akin to a game of hide and seek, for their past had always got in the way of true intentions. But perhaps just this time, this summer affair would last forevermore.

If there were a “Top 5 Nishida Panel Arrangement” ranking, this one would probably be my choice of crown for it captured characters' heartbreak and longing so brilliantly.

Before Wishes Fulfilled 『願い叶えたまえ』

Kinukawa, a mediocre pianist performing at a music bar, often felt strange stares upon him. Just his imagination, he had thought. Not until Kinukawa returned to his family-owned pastry due to hand injury, did he realize the scary-looking patron from the music bar, Fukami, was on his tail. Furthermore, to his surprise, Fukami even asked for his tutorship in piano.

Before Wishes Fulfilled is the renowned BL serial in Nishida sensei's early days, consisting of 3 volumes in total. My copies are over a decade old now, still looking brand new, since my primary experience was excruciating, I had no heart and desire to read them again. Years they were sealed up in my room, forgotten, until this review.

The reason to describe this work as excruciating, was the display of the character Fukami's scarred, miserable life, depicting his momentary comfort through music, and his dark descent into a spiral of violence, addiction and lust due to his upbringing and yakuza ties. Fukami was just as vivid as the darkness enveloped him, like a perfect storm, blowing away everything else in this series.

Fukami was loved by different people in various ways, they wanted Fukami monopolized, sheltered, or stopped from being what he used to be, a brute growing up adapting to a cruel world. 

Out of their own wishes they acted, regardless of Fukami's will. With all the burden he had carried, only the sound of Kinukawa's piano was Fukami's silver lining in the dark.

In the end, there was nothing romantic about the story. You would wish for Fukami's peace of mind, and even the wish for him to be happy was merely self-indulgence, the price to pay was a tattered future. 

Interpreting this work really got me emotional several times.

Regarding the translation #: CH title was a bit different from the JP title, which Google-san translated as “make your(my) wish come true”, whereas CH leaned more towards  “the journey before the wish is granted”.

Two extra shorts from Hanaoto's thematic anthology were attached as well. I'll be brief.

Love Is No Further Than Around You

Miura and Kato, colleagues and rivals in love, had their eyes on the same man within the company. They jeopardized each other all the time, knew every trick the other had up their sleeves, as if they could read the opposite's mind.

Experienced readers could tell the overall plot just by a look to the introduction. 

Nothing spectacular, but a funny one for sure.

My Dearest

“Show me the money if you wanna live!” A daring marauder broke into a dilapidated mansion and threatened with a fake gun, whereas the resident sat idly sipping on a cup of tea. Exactly how would this robbery end!?!?

Nishida sensei has always been exemplary at creating bad men, and so she did in this story. 

The sinister tried his damndest to take advantage of the gullible in a humorous manner, and the former was unexpectedly touched by the latter's sincerity, or something like that.

Personally, I was surprised by sensei's design choice for one of the leads, it was as if the character were from a bara manga.

Don't Say Anything『何も言うな』

Don't Say Anything + What Came Afterwards

Both gay and attractive, elite salesmen Kozakura and Mashima teamed up for a golden chance. Knowing their client preferred the company of men, they would totally nail this billion-dollar deal even if they had to sleep their way to it! With such determination, but little did they know the requisition they were going to face….

Libre Industrial that specialized in agricultural machinery and comestibles manufacturing, B-Boy Production? West & East Trading? Is this skit secretly about BL publishing business chain? Lol.

Two leads overcame their… disagreement and went into the foreseeable eventuality together. The overall story is fluffy and almost corny, that said I do think one would need to know a bit of Japanese commercial BL tycoons to get the inside jokes, otherwise the plot might seem inexplicable at times. 

Let me briefly explain those names above. Libre, a subsidiary to Animate, is a publishing house established to succeed the product line from the collapsed BiBlos in 2006, amongst the procured works including B-Boy magazine. (BiBlos was the pioneer of JP commercial BL publishing starting in the late 1980s.) As for West & East, it refers to Nishida sensei's pseudonym

Reach the Peak With The Director + The Night I Didn't Get A Hug From The Director

Transferred all the way back to HQ as a deputy chief, middle-aged technician Takeuchi did not click with his superior, Ogura. Takeuchi would assume his identity as a young and hunky salesman after work, and pour all his troubles to the amiable “Mr. Uncle” online.

Chronological order was reversed, the intro above was for The Night I Didn't Get A Hug From The Director.

A charming tale taking on internet persona and online dating, depicting the masquerade of two flawed men over the digital world, wearing their ideal masks. Impersonating as someone he never was, through wired words on the screen, Takeuchi envisaged possible lineaments of the considerate man on the other side. Such fantasies soon became realized, unexpected, with an infinite amount of possibilities, but way too short in length.

Regarding the translation:

#1:The JP title more of less meant “Penetrated by the director”, whereas CH translated to “F*cked to climax by the director”, sheesh! I was going for “Nailed by the Director”, buuuut I really wanted to emphasize on, um, the PEAK part, to fit both worlds.

#2: Looking at the Chinese version I initially got the idea the title should be them longing for each other night after night, hence I wrote down“Nights Without Bedding The Director''. However, when I read the original title, it seemed the title was directly referring to the night both protagonists and their façades finally met irl. Without giving more away, I decided on “The Night I Didn't Get A Hug From The Director ''...Too long! What is this title!? A light novel?

#3: I've scratched my head for years with this description: in Japanese, when someone gets“hugged/embraced” by another person, it  means said someone was the receiving party in terms of copulation. English does have equivalent words for it, but I was afraid I might mislead people. Anyway, since I was going to be specific, I thought I'd go all the way, but make it cuter…?

Restless Flowers

Living in solitary, elderly lady Tanaka met and invited two water strainer salesmen inside; one of them, the glib-tongued Suzuki, and the other, the veracious Sato, quite a ruckus they caused in her house, bedeviled, she was not sure what those two wanted out of her.

If my memory serves me right, the short came from a thematic anthology magazine, about women in BL stories. 

Like the lady in the story, frankly, I did not know how to react the first time reading this. 

I'm not at the age that can be called senile yet, however, I do resonate with observing and seeing old similarities recur in youngsters. It could induce both melancholy and simplistic joy, knowing you're in a world that never stops rotating.

Stirring Fingers

Praised by every catcher for his exceptional batting skills, nevertheless, Jun had been secretly craving for something different….

This one counts as porn in my book. Though sexual desire and impulsion are always explicitly shown in sensei's works, it is rare to see a work that's just…pure smut.

First kiss

Widowed policeman Yumino surprisingly found his high school classmate Yuri attending his wife's funeral. Their past may be ancient yet memories vivid, he recalled the kiss Yuri had stolen from him. All these years with zero contact, why did this man just show up from nowhere?

Just curious, did the leads in this short go to the same school as the ones in Adolescent Malady? Same detail I will not spell out here was stated in both works.

And it wasn't just the “classmates” setting, this short was almost a darker reverse to Adolescent Malady. 

Compressed plots bottled in the short length issue, one would have to dig down to see what laid beneath, a first love deeply buried, and characters' true motivation untold, left for readers to interpret on their own.

Nishida sensei started to limn via PC tools in this anthology, the change in strokes were evident. My eyes were still not used to it.

Until the End of the Night 『夜が終わるまで』

Prosecutor Hiura and lawyer Kageyama maintained a curious friendship since their training days. When Kageyama vanished, Hiura took charge of the investigation. Night after night he dreamt of intimacy with the disappeared man. After he met Kageyama's younger brother, the line between reality and illusion became even more blurry.

A psychological suspense piece read with stream-of-consciousness narrative, and possible supernatural elements. Might need a few whacks to fully crack it. 

Admittedly, I was rather confused the first time reading it, swamped with Hiura's disintegrating mental state and odd visual details shown on paper. 

Gazing directly into the story's core were many Nishida sensei's habitual features, with an inquiring plot as its exterior, the significant objective, however, were not of the truth, but our protagonist, Hiura's evolving self-awareness.

Following Hiura's unreliable perspective, a man lived in dread and the shock of possibly losing his friend forever, wherever he went, he thought of Kageyama for they shared similar backgrounds in law. Tantalizing memories from the past haunting him every lonesome night, grew into lust and regret that had come too late.

Like turning a string out of tune tighter and tighter, half of the thrill came from tagging along through this disorienting sensory experience, in which readers got to know Kageyama through Hiura's remembrance of the man, then ponder upon their hesitancy towards each other.

On a final note, their story truly started when it ended.

Romantic『ロマンティック』

Voluntarily came to a belligerent nation in search of his online student, Japanese teacher Maeda Kaname soon realized his own naivety. Amidst petrifying hails of gunnery, he met Jhon, a member of the indigenous rebel army.

I was apprehensive about revisiting this work. 

For the first time I felt like hitting a brick wall while promenading through the maze built by Nishida sensei. In gaming's sense, I was stuck, with neither the grasp or the knowledge to pass the mechanism. 

The plot was perspicuous, but what of the connotation?

Knowing that I know nothing, I sat before my PC one late night, spent hours comparing different language versions, examining word by word. Combining my notes and thoughts, it took me days to arrive at the destination of my own contentment.

A special case this was. I will post my ramblings here (Chinese only). Do read the manga before checking out my disastrous blather.

Complete proficiency is probably unachievable, I'm at peace with having my curiosity satisfied. The painstaking deed was done and I'm glad I did it. 

Now, after all the brain gymnastics, I can say without any doubt: Romantic is Nishida sensei's masterpiece, a rebellious song full of dissonance.

Apology for the lack of content, my brain was utterly spent lol

Let's just move on, shall we?

No Matter Heaven or Hell『天国も地獄も』

The relationship started in their high school days, Shirota and Himeno were miles apart in character yet close in heart. Standing on contrasting life paths, they faced the last chance to change their lives together, for once and all. 

A clear-cut romance depicting two men who had been on a fitful courtship for years finally had the chance to get together. Shirota, who had lived honestly, and Himeno, who had pursued the way of the underworld, tried to find love according to their respective lifestyles, nevertheless, no self-restraint could contain the deep-rooted fervor within them. 

Exerting every excuse to seek for every chance of connection, yet they had always hesitated, felt unsure whether to take another step, to change the rhythm of the dance. When the time came for them to shift life courses, what sacrifices would they make for this love?

When creating psychological conflicts, sensei often employs the method of “self narration versus true self,” resulting in characters caught off guard by their own emotions concerning love, causing the sense of resisting, and finally accepting their desires.In No Matter Heaven or Hell, this method was reversed, the protagonist, Shirota, bearing the readers' perspective, was adamant about his feelings for Himeno, yet reality struck him down in a completely unexpected way.

Countless romances raise the dilemma between love and morality. Persistence in love could achieve many, no matter constructive or destructive, beneficial or harmful. Your wanting could be always shadowed by societal norms, or self-condemnation.

Revisiting this story years later, it was not as brutally romantic as I had remembered. On the contrary, it left room for moral debates. Nishida sensei was relatively gentle in this regard.

Greet the Bride

Running his mouth at his ex's wedding, Tomoda didn't expect to find the bride's father, Noritake, sitting right behind him. Leaving no time for regrets, he was asked by Noritake to have a “talk” about his ex-boyfriend's past behaviors.

Typical accidental romance by Nishida sensei. The man hurt by a former fling unexpectedly engaged in a heart to heart conversation with an older gentleman that led to something possibly more. Characters with experiences yet still maintaining their sense of innocence resulted in a charming read. The kind of work I wouldn't mind seeing more.

This Must Be Love 『きっと恋に違いない』

Sasaki and Makino were co-workers. To his utter shock, the former uncovered the latter had secretly stashed a bunch of photos of him on the computer. Could it be that Makino harbored special feelings for Sasaki!?

A wordy and light-hearted “Type-Mistaken” skit, started out with Sasaki panicking all over the place while around Makino, who acted completely normal against the other's probing. 

Examining their interactions came the conclusion the two had been naturally closer than most colleague relations. 

The awareness of such feasible affection then breathed extra meanings into seemingly unintentional behaviors. 

Such a process of excessive concern eventually developed into full-blown fantasizing and yearning, shown through dainty yet sometimes goofy dialogues on pages. It is a rather humorous work.

Regarding the translation #1: Let me elaborate on this “Type-Mistaken” translation. I do not know its origin, neither do I know exactly how prevalent it is, at least it's popular enough for mandarin-speaking people to call it "誤解系""誤會流", a comedy sub genre focusing on characters misunderstanding each other. Maybe there was already a word for it on the net and I am too much of a cave dweller to realize that.

Show Me Your Best Face 

Kashiwagi, a rigid government official, received a call from his debt-ridden little sister who was threatened into starring in an adult video. Rushing to her aid, Kashiwagi reluctantly agreed to act in her stead. Albeit humiliating and shameful, he just could not forget Kawase, the man who guided him through the filming process.

Another classic duo choice: a prideful elite that never strayed from societal norm, met his counterpart, a magnetic yet coarse proletariat. 

Nishida sensei had shown their humanity, both positive and negative, in limited publication space. 

Hidden behind the armor of arrogance and vulgarity lay reciprocal fervidity, for to them, silence trumped direct love confessions.

To be fair, I should describe This Must Be Love as, um, MAGICAL, in a BL-istic sense. If I were to give a rating on how surreal it is, it would probably be a 9.

Love Is Insufficient『まだ愛が足りない』

Dedicated to the company, Inoue hit a major bump in the road for both his marriage and career. Now divorced and serving as the HR minister, he received a sexual harassment complaint against his former subordinate over a decade ago, Kitahara. Upon reviewing the situation, Inoue soon recognized Kitahara's nature of elusiveness.

Let's get this out of the way first: there were visible similarities between this work and Let's Fall in Love, particularly in regards to the characters. In spite of that, in my humble opinion, I find the mental duels and intricacies of this work to be the most captivating of all Nishida sensei’s office-themed works (within the range of this file ofc).

Albeit sharing likeness to the aforementioned title, the story is told from Inoue’s perspective. Attempting to rebuild his life after losing his family, Inoue, a straight man in his 50s, now had to deal with personal struggles and the enigmatic Kitahara that challenged him with vastly different beliefs and work ethics. 

They worked at the same company for years, but age gap and differing philosophies had carved a gulf between them. Nonetheless, the complaint acted as the bridge, connecting the separating shores. 

As of now, after floods of workplace romances, I am once again left aghast by Nishida sensei’s wonderful writing. Inoue and Kitahara, the two were confounded by the conduct of fallin in love, the subtleties to express love. While traveling down the path of seeking companionship, faulty imperfections born from time and false value blinded them, leading them down deadends.

Ultimately, the zestful depiction of the characters dazzled me the most. They were in no doubt Nishida’s creation, but one step closer to a lifelike imagery. Often I describe romance as tango, and this dance brought by Inoue and Kitahara, choreographed with mind and soul, impulses and smoking gazes, was a beautiful sight to take in.

You Are My Everything『君が僕のすべて』

Nabeshima, a jobless intellectual, accepted to work for the wealthy and irritable businessman named Takeda, hoping he might have a shot with the man’s  beautiful wife, Kazumi. Despite initial impressions, Nabeshima soon discovered Takeda’s sincere character, and the secret that led to the couple’s discord. 

I see shades of Fukami and Kudo (with a hint of Kinukawa) from Before Wishes Fulfilled in the two leads: Sharing similarities in background and career with Fukami, Takeda exhibited both innocence and assertiveness. His sense of inferiority resulted in him acting arrogantly. On the other hand, Nabeshima is the thinking type that endures and makes sacrifices in the name of love. Well, after reading this one, I get how hard it would realistically be for the ship of Kudo & Fukami to sail, lol.

Takeda reached eminence starting from humble beginnings, yet his lack of familial care and education had always haunted him, leading him to conceal his insecurities with thuggish words. When his marriage arrived at a breaking point, the sudden presence of Nabeshima, his complete opposite, triggered tension and hostility between the two men.

Nabeshima, however, remained a puzzling character to me, a romantic idealist to the bone, yet highly observant and considerate. His devotion to Takeda was an accident of the mind, falling for this rival in love while navigating through their family affairs.

It’s noteworthy that both leads initially identified as straight men, a rare setting for Nishida sensei. As they struggled through recognizing their true selves and desires, the road to harmony was bound to be bleak and arduous, leaving them scarred. However painful and unavoidable, the ink of love had sunk into their skins for good.

Riddled with mental burdens the main story was, so heavy that the bonus comedic skit in the postscript seemed particularly funny.

The Champion's Vacation『エースの休日』

Abandoned by his female companion, famous baseball player Hidaka had to embark on a cruise trip alone. To his disbelief, he was jumped by a stranger late at night, and threatened to give up on the whole course.  Feeling uneasy, Hidaka soon recognized that his attacker was none other than the captain of the ship, Matsudo.

A tsundere ruffian with a golden heart, met a lecherous single dad with an ostrich mentality. I asked myself if I would still appreciate the same plot and characters if they were done by a different mangaka, the answer to that will very likely be negative, especially given the saturated market nowadays was littered with parenting themed BL stories.

The Champion’s Vacation was a joyful outlier amongst sensei’s listing of works. Sensei could be hilarious at times, yet proficient at conveying agonizing mindsets for her characters and us readers. This book, however, was the opposite, cheerful and light-hearted, the leads may be lacking and evasive due to their past, but they didn’t shy away from confessing their love. With little twists and turns, what we got wasn’t something brilliantly spectacular, yet naturally sweet and endearing.

Reading in conjunction, comparing the pursuit of maternal affection and unyielding acceptance in You Are My Everything, The Champion’s Vacation put emphasis on concepts of fatherhood and parenting behaviors. 

The void left by a lost childhood turned into imperfections in characteristic and unacknowledged yearnings. The child character further facilitated examination on the interdependence between father and son relationships.

Sensei has issued an extra online, featuring another vacation memory showing the two taking a break with Matsudo’s son. Do consider taking a look here if interested.

The Song of Angels『天使のうた』

Doctor Michel got acquainted with the eccentric Adler father and son by accident. Years later, he was shocked to find the son, Alex, now a teenager, was selling his body in the gay red-light district. Michel endeavored to reach Chris, now a well-known music maestro, but he didn’t expect to get the cold shoulder. Chris had no intention to stop his son’s foolish behavior. Exactly what could’ve transpired between the Adlers?

The BL work tasted like early June style in late 70s-80s. Michel, a courageous man with a bit too much passion, unveiled the tragic mystery of the Adlers, and resolved their long-standing paternity complex, while his liaison with Chris was but a secondary aim. The primary focus of the narrative is on healing and betterment, with so-called romance serving as a lesser, but requisite objective.

The Song of Angels comprises two volumes in total, with the first one focusing on Michel’s interactions with Chris and Alex. At times the ludic father and son were evasive, yet they were no match to Michel’s sincerity. Along the trail to the Adlers’ trust, they also wiped off the loneliness Michel had gone through. In the second volume, the storyline took a dark turn. The haunting fate of destruction realized, along with the reappearing inner demon, the imminent end seemed destined.

I read The Song of Angels when in college and have since regarded it as sensei’s greatest magnum opus. Chris’s piercing eyes and unmatched beauty entranced me, taking over as Nishida sensei’s quintessential work in my mind.

Alright, that sounded extra superficial, huh? Well, to be more specific, Chris’s appearance is probably the least important reason for my appreciation of TSOA. I’ll even be so bold to call it a timely classic with reasons including its flawless blend of comedy and drama, the intense portrayal of emotions, and efficient storyboarding which captured characters’ thoughts and struggles. I say, TSOA is a must-read for any fan of advanced BL manga.

REACHING THE TERMINAL

And here we are, the destination. 

Let me gush just a little bit more, I guess.

I genuinely hesitated starting this long-winded collection of a review, for one might break the spell looking into something too closely. Thankfully that didn't happen to me, still happily enchanted. Nevertheless, I did have a hard time consuming other BL comics while working on this project lol

As for the works not getting published in Taiwan (or in any language I'd understand), I've purchased the JP version digitally for a while, just never had the heart (and enough language prowess)to read through them all at once. I wanna cherish the experience, gradually and leisurely. SO, someday, a part 2 of this wall of texts, maybe, we’ll see.

Trace back to my motivation, to be very frank, I just wanted to promote sensei’s works to more people. Unfortunately, as far as I know, most of Nishida sensei’s titles are out of print in Taiwan. Here's hoping Taiwanese publishing houses would acquire digital rights in the future.

I wrote a more light-hearted ranking article on storyboarding. The language would be more straightforward, but full of spoilers, and only in Chinese. If you've read this far and are interested, do take a gander.

Malty, 2023

Physical copies I happily own. (Been forever since I got a new one. Alas.)